“Borrowing is like a wedding; repaying is
like mourning.”—A Swahili
proverb.
THIS saying is well-known to people in East Africa, and it
undoubtedly reflects the sentiment of many in lands around the world. Is that
how you feel about borrowing money from a friend or other sources? Though it
might seem advisable at times, is it a good idea? What are the dangers and
pitfalls of borrowing?
Another Swahili saying gets to the heart of the matter. It says:
“Borrowing and lending spoil a friendship.” Indeed, debts can put friendships
and relationships in jeopardy. Even with the best of plans and the most sincere
intentions, things do not always turn out as expected. For example, if time
passes and due repayments are not made, the lender may become irritated.
Resentment could build, and the relationship between the lender and the borrower—and even between their families—may become strained. Since loans
are a potential source of friction, we might view them as a last resort rather
than an easy solution to money problems.
The borrower must realize that
until the money is paid back, he is under obligation to the lender. True is
another African saying: “If you borrow a man’s legs, you will go where he
directs you.” The idea is that one who is heavily in debt is no longer at
liberty to do what he would like.
Repaying what one borrows,
therefore, must be given high priority. Otherwise, difficulties will likely
arise. Mounting debts can result in much distress, as well as sleepless nights,
overwork, bickering between husband and wife, and even family breakups, not to
mention possible lawsuits or imprisonment.
IS IT
NECESSARY?
Well in view of all of this, it is best to be cautious when it
comes to borrowing money. It is prudent to ask: Is there a real need to borrow?
Is it a matter of saving your means of livelihood so as to care for your
family? Or is there a measure of greed involved, perhaps a desire to live
beyond one’s means (in most cases it’s this)? It would be better to make do
with less than to obligate oneself by borrowing.
Of course, there may be exceptions, such as when an emergency
arises and there does not seem to be any other way out. Even so, if a person
decides to borrow, he should show himself to be a person of good principles.
How can this be done?
First, never take advantage of
someone just because he or she seems to be better-off than others. We should
not feel that when a person appears to be well-off, he owes it to us to help us
financially. Nor should we feel that we are free of any moral obligation to act
with honest intentions toward such a person
Then, make sure to repay what you have
borrowed, and do so promptly. If the lender does not stipulate a specific
timetable, you should, and you should stick to it. It is recommended that you
put your agreement in writing in order to avoid misunderstandings on either side.
If possible, return what is borrowed to the lender personally so that you can
thank him yourself. Conscientiousness in returning what you borrow makes for
good relations.
The Swahili
proverb mentioned at the outset is well-known to many. Yet it has not stopped
people from borrowing.