Admittedly, it
is not easy to be a good father. But there are basic principles that can help
1. Make Time for Your Family
As
a father, how do you show your children that they are important to you? Surely
there are many things you do for your children, including the sacrifices you
make to feed them and provide them with an adequate home. You would not do such
things if your children were not important to you.
Yet, if you do not spend
significant amounts of time with your children, they might conclude that you
care more for other things, such as your job, your friends, or your hobbies,
than you do for them.
Fathers are encouraged to spend
time with their children on a regular basis.
2. Good Fathers Are Good Communicators
If
your children think that you will lose your temper quickly and be judgmental,
they will have little incentive to express their inner feelings to you. But if
you listen to them calmly, you will show that you are genuinely interested in
them. They will in turn be far more likely to share their precious thoughts and
feelings with you.
3. Give Loving
Discipline and Commendation
Even when you feel
frustrated or angry, the discipline you administer should be an expression of
loving concern for the long-term welfare of your child. It includes advice,
correction, education, and chastisement when needed. There have been ongoing debates on how far
parents should discipline their children. Just recently, Minnesota Vikings suspended their
star running back Adrian Peterson amid an outcry over charges he abused his son
by beating him severely.
Discipline is much more effective when a father commends his
children regularly. An ancient proverb says: “As apples of gold in silver
carvings is a word spoken at the right time for it.” Commendation enriches a
child’s character. Children blossom when they are acknowledged and appreciated.
A father who looks for opportunities to give commendation will help to build
confidence in his children and motivate them not to give up trying to do what
is right.
4. Love and Respect Your Wife
The way a father exercises his role
as a husband is certain to affect children. A very good friend who is a mother
of two said “the best gift from father to their kids is to treat their mother
with respect.” One of the best things a father can do for his children is to
respect their mother. . . . A father and mother who respect each
other and let their children know it provide a secure environment for them.
It is obvious that there is more involved in fatherhood than these
five points and that, realistically, even when you try your best to be a good
father, you are not going to be a perfect one. But to the extent that you apply
these principles in a loving and balanced way, you really can be a good father.